bless your heart

It is a little phrase people in the southern United States often use. If you didn’t know, it is not always used as a term of endearment or a compliment. Rather, it is often used as a derogatory statement meant to demean another in a “polite” southern way and what they really are often meaning when saying this is: “You are an idiot!”

Well, I don’t know about you, but I hate fake sweet. I would rather have someone who is brutally honest, like someone from an Asian culture can be, rather then someone fake right in front of my face yet pretending they are not.

Recently, I found myself in the southern United States for an event. It actually became one of the lowest times and most difficult days I have ever encountered emotionally. I was in the midst of rejection that I haven’t felt since way back when I was bullied and beat up in the seventh grade four decades ago. How could I keep it together and not retaliate to those so unwelcoming? How could I rise above the disdain and hate? How could I choose to love and have joy regardless of this uncomfortable circumstance?

But God!

Remember, Christ was rejected. So, be honored if rejection comes your way.

“For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in His steps.“ I Peter 2.21

Satan wants to divide; don’t let him.

Rise above rejection.

Rise above lies.

Rise above the selfish ways of others and take the higher road leaving the lesson of what not to do behind.

And whatever you do, don’t let me ever catch the words: “Bless your heart” coming from your lips.

If they spill out, others won’t see you…

be.the.church

Instead live out each and everyone of the fruit of the Spirit…

“…love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5.22-23

Also,

“…let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.“

I John 3.18

That is really the only way to bless another’s heart. Live out love and give your heart away.

where does your mind go…

Ever wake up from a dream and wonder where did that come from?

What are your last thoughts at night?

How about first in the morn?

Where does your mind go?

I hope it focuses on the positive and the joy of the Lord for…“This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalm 118.24

I try to repeat this verse over and over day after day year after year. Some days or weeks or years I am more successful then others.

In a New Year’s sermon some years back, the speaker challenged the congregation to say this every morning all through the coming year.

How about we try it for the rest of this month?

Whose in?

Comment below and let’s hold each other accountable.

Come April 30 let’s see how we have done.

I believe it will help us…

be.the.church

when we say this often…

“This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalm 118.24

don’t be a fool

Today is a day of jokes, pranks, and fun mostly in western civilization but, growing around the globe. For some countries, April Fools is a different day altogether. However, some take the joke playing too far and feelings get damaged. Don’t be that guy!

Go ahead coat an onion with caramel and serve it as an apple treat or booby trap the bathroom by putting Vaseline on the toilet seat or cellophaning under it.

Serve meatloaf with colored mashed potatoes as ‘icing’ for ‘dessert’ as you prepare them to look like delicious cupcakes.

Put sugar in the salt shaker or salt in the sugar bowl.

Fill Oreo cookies with toothpaste and have them waiting on a plate for an after school treat.

Or try my favorite prank that always gets me in return – put a rubber band over the sink sprayer so when an unsuspecting family member comes by to wash their hands; they get sprayed instead. Note to self: remember you set this up! Every year I tried this, I was the one getting wet from my own prank! Too funny.

If those pranks are not your fancy, here’s a few easy techy ones to try: change the times on all the clocks in the house and cars, change the language of someone’s cell phone, tape a piece of paper to the optical eye on a mouse that says you have been pranked that someone will find when trying to figure out what’s wrong, or how about set an alarm to go off in the middle of the night.

Pranks should be fun but harmless so don’t get carried away or do anything that would cause embarrassment or hurt feelings to another especially those you are closest too. Again, don’t be that guy, for that guy is a fool!

We are to love but not foolishly.

http://bibleapps.com/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

Having fun is okay but don’t get carried away and caught up in harming foolishness.

Some believe this silly day originated with Noah sending out a bird from the ark before the waters had receded, this Noah was a ‘fool’ since the ground was still covered. But, I say the real fools were the ones who poked fun and didn’t accept Noah’s message. Sadly, they perished when the flood waters came. And that to me is the most distressing reason to be considered a fool – the rejection of needing saving.

Go have some fun today, but be mindful others are watching so don’t let anything you do cause another to stumble or to be hurtful in anyway.

Don’t be a fool!

Be a person full of faith!

Like I said, it is ok to have fun but when the fun is done, others should always be able to point back to Jesus after spending time with you even if you pull an April fool joke on them.

Here’s what the Bible has to say about being a fool:

“Doing wrong is fun for a fool, but living wisely brings pleasure to the sensible. When the storms of life come, the wicked are whirled away, but the Godly have a lasting foundation.” Proverbs 10.23-25

“The wisdom of the prudent is to give thought to their ways, but the folly of fools is deception. Fools mock at making amends for sin, but goodwill is found among the upright.” Proverbs 14.8-10

“As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his foolishness.” Proverbs 26.11

“Fools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back.” Proverbs 29.11

“As dead flies cause even a bottle of perfume to stink, so a little foolishness spoils great wisdom and honor. A wise person chooses the right road; a fool takes the wrong one. You can identify fools just by the way they walk down the street!“ Ecclesiastes 10.1-3

“Those who trust in themselves are fools, but those who walk in wisdom are kept safe.” Proverbs 28.26

“Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others. A fool is quick-tempered, but a wise person stays calm when insulted. An honest witness tells the truth; a false witness tells lies. Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing. Truthful words stand the test of time, but lies are soon exposed. Deceit fills hearts that are plotting evil; joy fills hearts that are planning peace! No harm comes to the Godly, but the wicked have their fill of trouble. The Lord detests lying lips, but He delights in those who tell the truth. The wise don’t make a show of their knowledge, but fools broadcast their foolishness. Work hard and become a leader; be lazy and become a slave. Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up.” Proverbs 12.15-25 NLT

Let’s be the kind of person others can trust in and see us truly…

be.the.church

even if we serve deceptive looking ‘cupcakes’!

the rotting wood pile

For two seasons, I was in charge of everything in the house. Oil needing ordering, I ordered it. Water softener needing servicing, I did it. Even all the wood that need to be stacked, I stacked.

Then, more of the men were home again for one last summer together but stacking wood never became a priority for any of us partly because we were having too much fun when work day was done.

Stacking the wood was on the list for one to do before heading back to school. I was even going to pay him but no go. Another was preparing for a half marathon so no go for him too. And son 1 was busy finishing his thesis and preparing for his move overseas, so wood stacking was low priority.

I wanted it stacked in the summer so it could dry out well or by latest September since it hadn’t been covered and was just sitting in mulch on the driveway. It didn’t happen.

October I stacked about a cord but there were still 2 equally considerably sized piles to stack which were at least another 2 or more cords.

The thing is it doesn’t take long, it is just making the time to get it done, but it was low on the totem pole last summer.

For the previous years, I solicited help: neighbors, friends’ kids, and our church family. This year I assumed with more family around it would get done likety split.

When that didn’t happen, I had a choice. I could get mad or I could do something about it.

I choose the latter and choose not to complain, be upset, or let that wood rot any longer.

So, I employ you to do the same.

Don’t complain, don’t get upset if your time line doesn’t happen. Just don’t let that wood rot.

When we let things fester or procrastinate tasks, it is like that stinky, rotten wood that will return to dust instead of its intended use to warm the house.

So, I got stacking. I didn’t feel right about asking others to come alongside now that there were more able bodies at home. So, I just did it.

I stacked one cord, then for another 1/2 cord, I had some help and together we finished off one pile in just over an hour. I told you it doesn’t take long to do. All you have to do is make the time.

The issue was it was getting later in the fall and the rain kept coming. Without warm summer days to dry the wood fully out again, it was getting in gross shape.

The moral of the story is this: start sooner rather than later.

If the wood had been stacked by end of September, I wouldn’t have been dealing with a rotting wood pile that we paid good money for back in the spring.

My mom always said : “Don’t put off for tomorrow what you can do today!”

And that is great advice to live out.

So what is ‘rotting’ in your life? Is there something you have been putting off that just needs to get done? How about putting it in your calendar and get ‘er done!

Let me sign off so I can go stack some more wood and burn the rest of that nasty pile before warmer days are upon us.

“...whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”

I Corinthians 10.31

“Do everything without complaining or arguing” Philippians 2.14

When we apply those verses daily, we will…

be.the.church

to all those around us.

…many dreams bring futility, so do many words…*

Without having studied several other versions of this passage in Ecclesiastes, I am not sure I would have fully grasped the complete meaning.

At first, it seems to be saying not to dream or dreaming is futile. It, rather, is saying overwork makes you restless and when that dream becomes a reality there is no savoring but moving on to the next big thing.

A colleague’s wife was the epitome of this. She would be on to the next home building project before the last was barely finished. I believe it was because she lacked vision. She was just wanting to be busy rather than savor the end product of the plan now reality. She could not enjoy the success of one project because she was already working on the next. Thus, her many dreams were bringing futility. And so, it also is with too many words.

Dreams do come through much effort as stated in the amplified version but “…in a multitude of dreams and in a flood of words there is worthlessness. Rather [reverently] fear God [and worship Him with awe-filled respect, knowing who He is].”*

When we know where we are headed, when we know to whom we belong, when we know our dream of seeing our Savior face to face one day is true; it makes the dreaming easier.

It makes our faith walk a wee bit easier.

“…we walk by faith, not by sight…” II Corinthians 5.7

May we fear God in reverence and worship Him with respect; not just knowing who we are in Him, but who He!

Dream big.

Soar high.

Speak less.

Listen more.

We will…

be.the.church

when we do.

And please remember, more often than not, the fewer the words the better!

For when words are many; sin is often unavoidable (Proverbs 10.19 paraphrase BSB). Yes, too much talk can lead to sin (NLT paraphrase).

“Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.” (Proverbs 10.19b NLT) for restraining your lips is wise (NAS paraphrase).

Keep dreaming one dream at a time. Bridle your tongue. And love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind (Matthew 22.37).

*Ecclesiastes 5:7

travel makes you wiser

My first trip to Europe was in March of 1992. I found tickets to Italy for $299/person on Alitalia so I bought one for me and another for my dad. Then my sister and her husband decided to join too so we were off. When I returned and talked about the trip, the deal was still on and too good to pass up so my boss booked a trip too.

I didn’t know much about where I was going except the fact that my relatives lived 45 minutes outside of Rome and what I had remembered from history classes (which wasn’t much).

On this trip, I began to learn not only how sheltered I had been but how ignorant about so much as well.

No need to get into all those details but after this trip, I had a new thirst for knowledge and definitely caught the travel bug which forever changed who I am.

You see, unless we embrace other cultures and learn of their ways and customs, we live un-enriched lives.

You may not be able to afford to travel these days but you can travel through books, movies, and other cultural experiences. They will take your mind on adventures that will leave you desiring to learn more.

And if you are lucky enough to travel to another city, state, country, or continent, take my advice – don’t just show up like we did in 1992.

Do a little research.

Learn about the places you plan to see.

Get a pocket travel guide or print pages of infomation off the net to read on your way.

I like to see what the 1000 Places To See Before You Die books have to say about the destinations in our itineraries.

Plan to visit a local church or get in touch with a ministry you can spend a few hours serving with. Even just taking time to talk with homeless and offering them some food or drink will remind you how much you have to be grateful for. I promise it will enhance your trip. I bet those hours might end up being your favorite moments.

And don’t forget the best way to learn is to immerse yourself in the local culture. So take a cooking class or try their known dishes. Ask questions to locals. Ask for their recommendations of what to see, where to go, and of course what to eat.

Each trip will make you wiser than the last and help you grow to be more culturally sensitive.

I believe God desires for us to live in unity so get to know the ways of others here on earth. And if you have the privilege of traveling to some new place, the more you know before you go the better. Travel really will make you wiser.

Embrace the uniqueness of each new spot.

Embrace the beauty of God’s creation.

Embrace the people of the world because we are called to love all of them.

As we grow to know and love our ‘neighbors’ around the globe, we will learn to love better and then we can truly …

be.the.church

“How good and pleasant it is when we live together in unity.” Psalm 133.1

Christ won’t return till the whole world has been given an opportunity to accept Him. Who knows? Maybe that trip will be the ticket to eternity for someone you share your faith story with. That perspective helps change us to recognize opportunities when they come, doesn’t it? It also adds a dimension of knowing our traveling may just be the link to someone’s salvation. Now that’s a super cool thought.

Don’t just travel without keeping this thought at the forefront of your mind – the world needs to know Jesus so help Him be known.

be.the.church

Others need to see Jesus through you.

pass down wisdom not wounds*

What do you want to be remembered for?

What will your legacy be?

I come from a bit of a dysfunctional family, but don’t we all in some form or another. There is always some things that could have been better but it is what we do with the hurt that matters.

Don’t pass it down to the next generation.

Strive to love and live victoriously not as a victim.

Teach from your hurt, but love from your restored heart.

God is the lover of our souls and desires that we learn to love Him, ourselves then others. And once we get that down, we can change the order to:

J – esus then

O – thers then

Y – ou – ourselves last help keep the prospective…

and that will produce true

J-O-Y!

Let the joy of the Lord be your strength (Nehemiah 6.10)..

Sometimes it takes some healing and time so you can fully give of yourself. I know this too well. But, that time invested in yourself, will make you be able to love unconditionally.

This will be the legacy for which you will be remembered.

It is debatable who first said this quote but it stands true regardless: “People will forget what you said; they will forget what you do, but they won’t forget how you made them feel.”

Let that be your legacy – that others will feel loved, accepted, complete, and known in your presence.

Let the joy of the Lord guide you and the love of the Lord motivate you to love others in such a way that they can see Jesus in you and thus want to know Him for themselves.

You may need to do a little soul searching first, but it is worth every moment so you can pass down wisdom and not wounds.

And remember, nothing can change God’s love for you or any of us on this earth.

Be patient with yourself and more importantly with others.

For… “love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud…it always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres”. I Corinthians 13.4-8

Let that be your legacy!

Remember, this generation is responsible for this generation’s salvation so tell others of the faith you have within.

“One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.” Psalm 145.4

We will

be.the.church

when we do this and that will be a great legacy to leave behind.

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” Deuteronomy 6.5-7

Leave a legacy for the next generation.

*Kerwin Rae quote

be red in a grey world

We were living as expats* and I had the cutest little car that was fire engine red. Most cars in this country were grey, black, or an occasional white.

None were red.

Not a one!

And I loved being different by having a red car.

It certainly stuck out and was easy to find in a parking lot.

I called the car ‘Reddy’ not only because of its color, but because it was ready to go fast. Okay, maybe that was me who wanted to go fast.

At any rate, I didn’t mind standing out one bit but kid 1 did. He even wanted me to drop him off away from school so no one would know the car belonged to our family. So with the consent of the school guard, I decided I would make it easy for him. I refused to drop him off away from the building, but instead dropped him off right in front and promptly beeped the horn which was a faux pas for this quiet, “proper” culture . I don’t necessarily recommend this approach, but now there was no longer a reason to be embarrassed by the car since all now knew who it belonged to. Sometimes we just want to fit in, especially in junior high and high school. We often don’t want to stick out, and surely most at that age would not welcome such an obnoxious good bye being yelled from the bright red, horn-blowing car.

What’s the point?

We were made to shine.

We were made to stick out.

We are to be difference makers this side of heaven and be ‘ready’ when anyone asks us of the hope we have within or why we have joy.

When they do – tell them the joy of the Lord is your strength. (Nehemiah 9.10)

We need to be living, colored proof that God is alive.

We need to live life out loudly, boldly, and maybe even clothed in red because people need to see us as red in a grey world in order to see us…

be.the.church

Yes, it is true as the lyrics in the song link below say: “We were made for so much more than ordinary lives … we were made to thrive.” That is how others can truly view us as being red in a grey world.

Dare to be bold.

Dare to be a difference maker.

Dare to stand up for righteousness and don’t retreat when an opportunity arises for you to share your faith.

Go ahead and beep that horn. Let the whole world know Jesus is your Lord and you want His name to be known.

Casting Crown live video:

Thrive with lyrics video:

Be red in a grey world.

*an expat is someone who lives in a country that he is not a native of and sometimes it feels like you stuck out like a sore thumb or red car especially when not doing things exactly as the locals like or expect – for example, when we moved we were expected to go and introduce ourselves immediately to the neighbors, but where I come from the neighbors are expected to come introduce themselves to those who move in

miss the mark

What’s the difference between one degree in a hotel room – the difference of being hot or cold as there is usually no in between.

One degree in highway planning – a highway that leads to no where.

One degree in schooling – the difference between that dream job and just making a living.

Don’t think the little details don’t matter. They do!

And don’t miss the mark by living life haphazardly.

Never grow weary of doing good.

Good choice; bad choice count the cost.

One bad choice can cost you your life.

Make sure you are ready to meet your maker and not miss the mark.

“Do you not know?

Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God,

the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He will not grow tired or weary,

and His understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary

and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,

and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the Lord

will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40.28-31

pet peeves*

What is something that just gets your goat*?

What are the things that get you annoyed or angry?

What are your pet peeves?

Maybe when someone copies your work it drives you crazy. How about when someone has to have the last word or keeps arguing when they have already been proven wrong? Then there is those who eat with their mouths open or maybe don’t use deodorant. The list could go on and on – commercials, driving too slow in the fast lane, inconsiderate smokers, people talking at the movies, slow walkers, fast talkers, texting while driving, pushy salespeople, people not using turn signals, hands not washed in restroom, toilet paper roll put on the wrong way, on and on and on!

What about bad grammar. I know someone that truly could apply for the grammatical police position and be hired on the spot. Being so proper in the English Dept. you can imagine typos, grammatical errors, and improper use of vocabulary are all on their pet peeve list.

Songwriters know this all too well too. Thus, lyrics are so very important. When they are not quite right or used just because they rhyme or syllables in a word fit are a no go for someone that knows better.

Think about the role of a worship leader. Having a heart of worship also makes one very aware of choosing songs to lead that you can completely agree with the doctrine behind the words. Sometimes we can get worked up on words that could potentially trip someone up in their faith walk and then those songs become pet peeves.

Commendable – yes!

Needed – certainly!

But we must show respect or maybe even keep quiet about that thing that annoys us as most of the time it is just a little point of contention that should be overlooked.

How can we truly show the world our love? – By getting over our pet peeves!

Pet peeves really are saying what I think is irritating means others in the world should change. But shouldn’t we be changing so the world can see the love of God shining through us even in the midst of annoyance?

Yes, I think that is the ticket.

And we might want to consider the plank in our own eye before trying to pick out a neighbor’s speck (Matthew 7.1-5). We also are not to sow discord (Proverbs 6.19).

So go do it!

“Stop judging, that you may not be judged. For as you judge, so will you be judged, and the measure with which you measure will be measured out to you. Why do you notice the splinter in your brother’s eye, but do not perceive the wooden beam in your own eye?” Matthew 7:1-5

“There are six things the Lord hates— no, seven things he detests: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that kill the innocent, a heart that plots evil, feet that race to do wrong, a false witness who pours out lies, a person who sows discord in a family.” Proverbs 6:16-19 NLT

Chew on that for awhile and…

be.the.church

Don’t let that pet peeve get your goat!

*the saying ‘get your goat’ refers to your state of peacefulness. If your goat is with you, you are calm, cool, and collected. But if your goat is missing or stolen, you would obviously be upset or angry.

“The saying “Get Your Goat” supposedly originated from the early horse racing days, where goats were kept with nervous race horses to keep them calm before the race, and if you wanted to beat the competition you would ‘get their goat’ causing their horse to become agitated and unable to race.”(quoted from the site: goathavenfarm.tripod.com)

Hey, do me a favor, please add your pet peeve below or what you think God might have as a pet peeve and let’s do our best not to let them get our goats!